I’ve always been spiritually adjacent. Growing up in the Bay Area in the early 2000’s and spending copious amounts of time on Telegraph Ave in Berkely I saw a lot of hippies, Hari Krishna’s, Buddhism, Yogi’s, and spiritual seekers. I always admired them from afar for their devotion and unrelenting faith in something greater than themselves.
I went to Catholic school and come from a long line of devout Roman Catholics, but religion and the idea of the Catholic God never resonated with me. I called myself a Catholic but I wasn’t deeply connected to the religion. I honestly didn’t think too much about it. Being religious or spiritual weren’t ideas or words I used to define me. I was an athlete, a little bit of a hippie chick, Italian, an only child…those were the terms I used to described myself.
I spent most of my life sort of floating in that agnostic space until the Pandemic hit and I gave birth to my son in the Spring of 2021. That entire time was so transformational (and scary) for me. When I came back from the hospital with my son, I felt a noticeable shift in my relation to something greater than myself. At first it was quiet and I couldn’t put words to what I was feeling, and then it began to feel like a pull towards something, like I was missing something, or seeking something…but I didn’t know what. It felt like I needed answers, like I needed to better understand why I was here, my purpose, what made me happy, how I wanted to show up for my family. I just had so many questions that didn’t seem to have answers. I found myself saying, “there’s gotta be more to this life than this day-to-day grind”. I was also in the throes of motherhood with a newborn and a two-year-old, sleep deprived, at my wits end, and honestly just going through an existential crisis.
So, I began seeking out a mentor. I sought out a woman recommended by a friend to help me organize myself and thoughts around all these new feelings. I worked with her for over a year to begin the journey of learning my soul, my intuition, and working with my higher consciousness. Pulling apart my ego self and my true self, un-conditioning myself from what I “thought” I should be and who I “thought” I was, leaning into my divine feminine. During this time, I just became ravenous to learn more and to deepen my connection to Spirit. And let me tell you, once you lift the veil to the other side, it’s hard to go back.
Today, I continue to strengthen my relationship to Spirit through meditation, divination tools like tarot and oracle cards, somatic movement, and music. It’s a long and challenging journey which involves asking a lot of hard questions and hearing a lot of hard truths. Removing people and situations that no longer serve you and creating boundaries that can make you feel like a bitch. Let’s not forget when you first start out and that spiritual ego gives you a false sense of “holier than thou” mentality. I mean, when they say it’s a journey through the dark night of soul, they ain’t lyin.
And the path is not a path of perfection, it’s messy, and sad, and filled with strange emotions. But it’s a journey to learning yourself…your true self. And it’s a journey everyone deserves to start. These words are not meant to pressure you, or make you feel less than if you don’t have a relationship with Spirit, I’m only speaking to my experience.
But if you are ready to take some steps on your spiritual path, I’m here to help. I'm no expert or guru but I am rife with resources and I love to share meditations, books, people, and courses that I’ve loved and that have helped me. I’m here in service of Spirit and our community…so let me know if you ever need anything.
All my love,
Anna
